A MMOers Guide to Getting Some:
One of the most important things in the Game of Real Life (GRL) is that a group always has better success then a soloer. While it is true that some very skilled chars might be able to a solo a high level MOB (Money Obsessed Bitch) right off the bat, most noobs should start off in a group.

The foundation to any solid group lies within the Trinity:

TANK: His job is to keep the MOBs attention directed on him, so that the other chars can perform without fear. A tank needs to be funny and clever, with a hint of arrogance and assholeism. The MOBs need to feel a mixture of hatred and interest so they stay glued to him. The Tank needs a lot of HPs (internal fortitude) so that he can withstand the constant bitching and general hatred for the party.

MAGE: The Mage’s main job is to lower the MOBs HPs until the point where the party can loot. Mages have a wide arsenal of attacks to destroy their enemies, specifically DDs (Beer Funnel), AOEs (A round of tequila shots), PBAOE(Body Shots) and DOTs (Keg Stands). Mages should also some limited form of crowd control like snares (Stealing Car Keys) and sleeps (Discussing the virtues of Duran Duran).

HEALER: Healers have arguably one of the least rewarding jobs. Basically they need to watch the other party members and heal when necessary. Many times the mage will take too much agro (”Stop stealing my shots you slut!”) and the healer needs to step in to save the day (”Don’t mind him, he’s just drunk. Say those are some nice shoes!”).

Remember, you have to crawl before you walk. Jumping right into mid to high level zones (Trendy City Bars, Model Parties) is likely to cause full party wipes or even PKen from other high level chars. My advice is to fully utilize the noob zones (High School Events, College frat parties) until level 21. Yeah those areas have crappy loot (fugly sorority girl who met and exceeded the freshmen 15) but at least you’ll get some xp and be on your way to bigger and brighter areas.

TIPS: Optimal party size is around 4 to 5 members. Too many people and the loot distribution will be horrible, or worse the MOBs will run before you even get into agro range.

Gear can really make or break a group. Some good items to have are: +dmg weapons (Extra Big Shot Glasses)
+stamina trinkets (ATM card)
and lastly some +resistance armor (Hollister Shirt).
While some of these items may look stupid on your char, remember
that function is more important than style.

Looting should be done on a need before greed basis. Guys who can’t use certain items (Don’t like BJs) should not take a roll on them, and should pass it on to fellow group members.

Well I hope this little guide will start you off in this great MMO we call Life. With time and patience you too can be a high level char, respected by the community.

This entry was posted on Monday, August 8th, 2005 at 1:20 pm and is filed under Classes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.